BMBx, Part 2

From the desk of Dr. Joseph Lin
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Hey folks,

It’s me again! Can you believe that I’ve been in the hospital for 5 ½ weeks?! It’s also crazy that it’s been a little over a year since I was diagnosed. Time has both gone by so slow and yet so fast.

I’ve been trying to just keep busy, so I still do lots of reading and watching TV and a lot of conversation with Karen, family, and friends. Recently, I read a fun book called “Why Do Men Have Nipples”, which answers silly medical questions you’d be embarrassed to ask your doctor (thanks Vince!), Blink by Malcolm Gladwell, which was thought provoking but I’m not sure I fully buy into. And of course, I’ve been reading the Bible. I’m almost through the Book of Job. We finished watching the first season box set of 24, which was excellent.

Lately, I’ve been calling myself in Taiwanese what to you guys sounds kinda like “luong bey pie,” which translates into “unbreakable”. I’m telling you, I’m a tank, man. Knock me down and I get back up. It’s really comforting to know that I personally do not have to worry. I leave it to the doctors and ultimately lift all the burdens to God. Of course, I still get disappointed with bad news, but in a strange way, I’ve never been more calm about everything. I’m just watching God’s plan play out. Every day that I wake up in the morning and see Karen curled up in the semi-reclining hospital chair (which she claims is comfortable) and I see her in deep coma-like sleep with mouth wide open and eyes half open, I smile. Means I’m here another day.

Right now, I’m basically in a big holding pattern until my appointment in Cleveland this Friday at my alma mater. It’s quite interesting that two of the institutions where I trained and worked are the two I am now counting on to save my life. Not sure what it means… We are very excited about the prospect that an umbilical cord transplant may finally be the answer.

While I wait, my breathing has returned to almost normal and I take a lot of walks around the unit. I would not recommend getting pulmonary hemorrhage. If you’re that couple and one of you is convinced “But, honey, it really sounds like a good deal.” Politely decline. The same applies to retinal hemorrhage, which I also had. There’s still residual blurriness in my left eye but it is oh so gradually getting better. It’s mind blowing to know that I am more or less being kept alive right now by other people’s blood products, since my bone marrow doesn’t seem to be making much of anything right now. I require platelet transfusions just about every day and red blood cell transfusions about every 1 ½ weeks or so. I also get Neupogen injections about every 3 days to rev up my white blood cells. So anyway, the Cleveland appointment is of utmost importance because we are going to decide on a treatment path from there.

Now, you noticed the title of this blog is BMBx, Part 2. Since it’s been many moons since I’ve talked about this and I face the prospect of bone marrow biopsy #9 in Cleveland, I thought I’d take the opportunity to further educate you about this most useful and most primitive tool of Hematology-Oncology in question and answer format.

Q: What is a bone marrow biopsy?
A: It’s best not to know.

Q: How is it done?
A: Scientifically speaking, they jam a huge needle into your lower back side and extract a little bit of life out of you.

Q: Should I have a bone marrow biopsy?
A: The answer from the society of Hematology-Oncology doc’s is an emphatic yes. My advice: do not engage a Heme-Onc doc in casual conversation because the next response will always be “Hmm… sounds like a bone marrow (in their lingo it’s always “bone marrow” and not “bone marrow biopsy”) is in order here." So if I were you, I’d avoid the “bone marrow” like the plague.

Q: Does this procedure hurt?
A: The word “hurt” is not recognized in the medical community. The more appropriate term is excruciating pain. And in this case, yes. I would beg and plead with your doctor to give you a near overdose of morphine, which not only relieves your pain but also makes you think you are on Mars. If you’re really persistent (but in a nice yet semi-groveling way), he/she may even send you home with a doggie bag of morphine (good stuff…)

Q: Is this a sterile procedure?
A: Of course, but for some reason, the practitioner of the biopsy always dons this outfit that has a striking resemblance to Darth Vader. (Alternatively, this could be the morphine).

Q: Will I be scarred for life physically and/or mentally?
A: Yes and Yes

Q: Is it appropriate to scream or shriek prior to/during/after the procedure?
A: Feel free to do it as much as you want. But you will have to be willing to have a large stamp in your permanent medical record that says “TOTAL WUSS”… on the front of the chart next to your name.

Q: Is it true that movie directors, producers, etc are often seen in the BMT (bone marrow transplant) offices?
A: Yes, good way to get autographs. I now have Ron Howard’s and Martin Scorsese’s. They are venturing into the horror genre and want me to pass along upcoming working titles called Stick the Eye, BMBx, and Patch Adams 2.

Well, I hope that helps you out. I just took a little splash of morphine from my secret stash, so I think I’m going to take a little nap.

Joseph
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Thank you Gretchen, Lauren, & Nancy B. for the cards. Joe cherishes each one he receives.

Thank you Vince for stopping by for a visit. It was so wonderful to see you after so long. Thank you also for being so sly and leaving behind the fun gift and super sweet and hearfelt letter.

Thank you to the PCC 5th & 6th graders for the super awesome card. It is at home right now, and will greet Joe once he gets out of the hospital. I know he'll love it.

HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY to Lisa B. :)