Day 30!!

Hey y’all,

I’m back on the blog for another one of Joe’s ramblings. Karen has been doing such an amazing job with the blog. She seems to have a knack for summarizing complicated series of events very perfectly.

Well, I did it! I’ve made it to the first major milestone Day 30 without any serious problems. Of course, the occasion was marked with having to get my 5^th bone marrow biopsy (but who’s counting?!) This will be the first direct objective data on how my body is responding, so let’s all pray for excellent results. It’s weird… internally my body is waging a war and I’m actually rooting for my guys to lose.

So to commemorate the occasion, Karen and I have decided to take a two week trip to Fiji, after which we will re-dedicate our efforts to my healing. We leave tomorrow morning. Of course, this scenario only plays in my head. Fortunately, I’ve got quite a few friends who we shall refer to as Bus, Big Ben, Slash, Chin, and Taz (strangely quiet Polynesian fellow) who come around just to say hey. (Sadly, also in my head) On the up side, I’m told I am permitted to have a few visitors to the house as long as they have no visible sores and have been decontaminated, disinfected, deloused, and preferably autoclaved x2. Apparently, even though my white counts are good, I’m still on so many immunosuppressive drugs that I’ve been told to stay away from public areas for a good many more months. Thank goodness for the internet.

Each day, I am feeling stronger and overall better. It’s seems like I’m constantly trading one set of minor problems for other set, but so far, no major complications. Praise God! I will tell you that I have new found appreciation for cancer patients undergoing treatments and anybody else with chronic illness. It’s a true test of strength, courage, perseverance, patience, restraint, faith, and anything else you can think of. There are so many opportunity costs with waiting in the lobby, waiting for results, waiting to see the doctor. The hospital literally becomes your second home.

Curiously, throughout this whole process, I think that my faith has strengthened. When I was admitted in the hospital in June, I was basically terrified and suffered two truly frightening panic attacks in which I thought I was dying. After the second one, I believe that God spoke to me, not in words, but by lifting a great weight off my shoulders. It’s then that I knew it wasn’t my time to go. And I haven’t looked back since. God has a plan. I’m still not sure what my role is, but I’m figuring it out. I know that He watches over me and my family because He has provided me with an excellent team of doctors and nurses and loads of supporters. Like I said before, I believe that most people are truly good. I think I received over 100 e-cards this last visit at the hospital (a new record) and many were from people I know only peripherally. I even got one from a brief acquaintance of ours from the Netherlands! And that’s not including all the countless other cards and gifts we’ve received. Thank you so much!

These days, I continue to do a lot of reading (when I’m not dozing), watching TV / movies, playing Scrabble with Karen, and basically just trying to make the best of the situation. It’s pretty easy staying positive when you’ve got a wife like mine. She’ll instantly cheer up any room. Like one of my colleagues said, this isn’t just positivity, it’s EXTREME positivity. Well, be on the outlook for postcards from Fiji. We’ll talk to you when we get back.

Joe